|
Do we need a middle ground? Something between the grind
of executive life and the quiet burble of the nap that precedes the
long sleep?
Be 'at Breakfast' until at least 10 A.M.
We can do this because we're executives and have attained a certain ability to be in no particular place whatsoever. In fact, this is an asset in the eyes of most senior management structures. "Where's Horst?" somebody will say, and will be told, "At a breakfast with a client or something." My, what a hardworking mogul is Horst!
This elasticity of space and time is one of the great benefits of late-stage employment. The development of digital ubiquity, while in general being a massive pain in the sphincter, also allows the seasoned BlackBerry aficionado to be nowhere and everywhere at the same time. This stretches and blurs the requirements formerly associated with being a responsible corporate citizen (try melita coffee maker ).
As all who have shuffled off the corporate built in coffee makers
find it advisable to do, we walk to a leisurely breakfast at our local diner, bagel place, or coffee shop. There we enjoy a massive cup of joe while reading the daily newspaper with some care, saving the obituaries for last, since they are the most enjoyable for people of our experience and years. Yes, we glance at our BlackBerry every now and then just to make sure no explosions are happening - and this is the best part of all. Real retired people must look forward to a total day of nugatory impact. We have some action to look forward to!
Not too much. But some. And if there's a crisis to deal with that halts our morning ritual, so much the better. It will be all the sweeter tomorrow.
After having dealt with crucial phone calls and e-mails on our daily constitutional to the office, we arrive at our desk to find a number of vital issues awaiting. Our retirement project is in danger, since many of these questions have teeth and little barbed tails that can whip around and take your eye out.
Enjoy a long lunch
So while Ted and Ned and Betty and Fred deal with Mr. Roover, who is looking into outsourcing certain key corporate functions in which we have no interest, we're going to move to the next part of our day: a pleasant, prolonged lunch.
Genuinely retired people, of course, have as long a lunch as they want, but the experience is likely to be depressing. How are we, who have enjoyed tasty, elegant expense-account lunches for several decades, to get excited about a tuna fish on whole-wheat toast, taken sitting in our kitchen while looking at a small flat-screen television that is constantly tuned to CNBC? For a year, perhaps, it might be nice. After that? They shoot horses, don't they?
But just think of all the great things we can enjoy in our blessed state! Plump burgers with mountains of fries! Thick, juicy steaks! Sushi-quality tuna over leafy greens! After our main course, we stick around the table for a while, savoring our coffee and the little cookies that are one of our fondest indulgences. Then we perambulate back to the office for the central event in the day of any retired wage slave, actual or virtual: our afternoon nap.
Take back the night
As our assistant plans our travel schedule and the afternoon wanes to dusk, we may want to call our spouse to set up our plans for the evening. Things have actually been going quite well for us as a couple these days. To begin with, we're a lot more relaxed than we used to be, almost as if the weight of the world had been lifted from our shoulders. This has made us more pleasant, emotionally available, and yes, amorous. Our late mornings have given us an extra hour or so to be together, so much nicer than in the days when we were up at 5:30 A.M. and out of the house at 6 with a muffin in our teeth.
Now, as the moon rises over the park, we stroll home and think about everything but business. Tonight, after perhaps a cocktail, we will be going out with some friends who just flew in from the coast. They're happily and virtually retired in Los Angeles, where guys in show business learned how to do this long ago.
In the end, friends, the success or failure of this enterprise resides with ourselves. We're as young as we feel and as old as we look. We've been doing things our way for quite some time. There's no reason to change the game that got us here, is there?
Perfect idea
for making espresso coffee
|
